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To put you in the right frame of reference here, this would be one of the last two shows WCW presented before the Hogan Era. Bo-Bo was already signed at this point but wouldn't make an appearance for another couple of months. Ric Flair is a face World champion who may or may not have recently turned on his friend Rick Steamboat. Rick Rude is the "International World Champion" and feuding with Sting, Steve Austin is US champ, Steve Regal is TV champ, and the Nasty Boys are tag champs and feuding with Cactus Jack and various partners, most notably Maxx Payne and Kevin Sullivan. The show is live from Chicago, Illinois, with Schiavone and Heenan on commentary and Gene Okerlund and Jesse Ventura doing interviews. Good enough. Badd is nicely into his face turn here, so he's got the confetti blaster and is modeling slightly-less-fruity attire. Page brings two interesting things to the ring: an incredibly skanky-looking Diamond Doll (Kimberly), and about thirty extra pounds, most of it in his face and ass. Page has just eschewed his managing position for full-time in-ring work, so he's what we insiders call a REALLY SHITTY WRESTLER at this point. Cameraman is too busy ogling Kimberly to shoot the beginning of the match, but we'll assume Page attacked before the bell. Badd takes control in short order with a rollup, then clothesline Page over the top rope in clear view of the ref. Remember that, it's important later. Page rolls back in the ring and Badd works on the arm with the usual (armwringer, hammerlock, armdrag, armbar), briefly broken up by a nice over-the-shoulder slam and back elbow by DDP. Awkward mat reversal sequence leads to a really nice modified snapmare and dropkick by Badd. Mero was a pretty underrated talent back in the day. Page takes control with a decent backdrop suplex and takes us to Kick-and-Punch Land (Bo-bo's royalty there, you know). Ugly gutbuster and pre-Goldberg jackhammer by Page. Badd counters a standing headlock with a backdrop suplex of his own, then a Rydeen-style inverted atomic drop (lifting DDP up by the armpits) and an UGLY headscissor takedown. Right hand (no longer called the Tutti-Fruity Punch) knocks Page out of the ring, and Badd follows with a good-enough plancha. Badd climbs the ropes as Page rolls back into the ring, and a sunset flip from the top gets the win. Page and Badd would go on to have some damn fine matches the next year in a feud for the TV title, but this one was only slightly-better-than-average. Ventura and Okerlund hype a few of the upcoming matches, including Flair-Steamboat and the Nasty Boys v. Cactus Jack/Maxx Payne, then send us back to the ring for the next match... This is shortly after the breakup of the Hollywood Blondes and Pillman's badly-executed face turn, and he and Regal have had a mini-feud to lead up to the PPV, culminating with Regal piledriving Pillman on the concrete the week before. Pillman attacks Regal before the bell- apparently even Brian doesn't know why he's a face here. Chops in the corner by Brian until he notices Regal's left thigh is taped up and places a couple of shots there instead. Badly blown legdive/rollup gets two for Pillman. Funny sequence follows: Regal is on his knees, Flair-style, begging off a Pillman attack, and Pillman responds by dropping to his knees and slapping Regal in the face. Japanese armdrag by Regal to counter a whip, and he rolls outside for some counseling from Sir William (Bill Dundee, who really should be brought back now to manage Regal/Taylor/Finlay). Pillman and Regal brawl on the outside for a bit. Back in the ring and Pillman heelishly works on the arm to a big pop from the Chicago crowd. Christ, you'd think we were in Philly. Really bad psychology here, as Pillman completely ignores Regal's (worked) leg injury and continues to work the am. Regal counters with a sort-of Northern Lights suplex, and launches into his usual shoot-style submissions, all of them badly sold by Pillman. These two just aren't gelling here, and the fact that they haven't cut this short by now pretty much gives away the ending, especially if you're familiar with Regal's title reigns. STF by Regal, called "kind of an STF" by Schiavone, and forget I ever said he used to be good at his job. Odd bow-and-arrow, called a "crossbow" by Tony. UGLY rana by Pillman, but Regal hits the rolling fireman's carry (you know, Finlay's finisher) to take control again. Another modified bow-and-arrow spot blown by Pillman. Ring announcer DOES give away the ending by beginning the end-of-match countdown at five full minutes. Kicks and punches by both men to stall. Three minutes, and a nice dropkick and enziguiri by Pillman. Regal shrugs off a monkeyflip attempt, but misses a kneedrop. One minute left and Pillman hits another really nice dropkick. Now a flurry of offense from Pillman - back body drop, chest chops - but Regal catches him in a bear hug off the ropes and both men go over the top rope to the floor. They brawl with ten seconds left, and both men fight back to the apron as the time limit expires and Regal retains. Not a good match by either man's standards, as they wrestle completely different styles and just couldn't get together here at all, which wouldn't have been so bad if the match could have been cut short to an eight minute Regal win. This would be the mother queen of garbage matches, and there's no way you're getting play-by-play here. I'm usually not a fan of this kind of thing, but this is without question my favorite garbage match ever, and any of you vampires out there who think FMW is the end-all be-all of garbage greatness need to see this one. Brutal, brutal spots galore here with real weapons, not gimmicky props, including chairs, tables, a pool cue, and a snow shovel. The match is pretty much Sags/Foley in the ring and rampway area and Knobs/Payne brawling all over the arena, eventually destroying a concession stand and using the debris as a weapon. Only one blown spot here, as Sags accidentally stands right on the score of a breakaway table while trying to piledrive Jack through it, and both men collapse. Payne should really have a job in ECW by now; he's a much better brawler than a few of the garbagey guys there now. Best spot of the night comes as Jack suplexes a table onto a prone Sags on the rampway, nearly breaking both of his legs. Ending finally comes with two sick, sick bumps by Foley: first he takes a headfirst dive to the concrete off the rampway, then Sags nails him right in the face with the shovel, bouncing the back of his head off the concrete. And THAT's enough for the pin, as the Nasties retain the titles. Again, this is probably the best garbage match I've ever seen, and it's worth the price of the tape alone. Austin brings the belt, Col. Robert Parker (Tennessee Lee to you WWF younguns), and a really bad haircut to the ring; Muta is accompanied only by his sheer will to dog every US match he's been in since 1991. Seriously, if this was '93 Austin v. '89 Muta it would be an instant classic; as it stands, I don't expect much, but we'll see. Stalling to start as Heenan and Schiavone talk up Austin's new finisher, the Hollywood and Vine. Muta's first offensive move is a sitting headlock- not a good sign. Reversal sequence leads to an abdominal stretch by Muta, eventually reversed by Austin, but an elbow to the neck puts Muta back on top. Another sitting headlock, and Austin powers up (no pun intended) and hits a backdrop suplex. Muta reverses a vertical suplex into a sweet-ass brainbuster, called a "suplex that dropped Austin right on his head" by Schiavone. Yep, that's what brainbusters do, Tony. Muta hits his delayed elbowdrop, which I'm convinced was the inspiration for the People's Elbow. Back to a sitting headlock, and Austin again powers up, but gets nailed with a gorgeous dropkick. ANOTHER sitting headlock. Heenan does his best to sell the constant restholds as "good psychology" instead of "rampant laziness" on Muta's part. Austin reverses to a headscissors, apparently countered by Muta by pleasuring Austin orally. That was a REALLY bad camera angle, guys. Austin rolls outside for words of wisdom from Parker, and the "KFC" chants begin. Back in, and Muta varies his offense with a STANDING headlock. Austin whips Muta to the ropes, and Parker trips him, distracting him long enough for an Austin knee to the back to send him outside. Austin distracts the ref as Parker chokes Muta. Austin with a diving elbow off the apron. Careful, Steve, that kind of move could cause permanent injury to your knee and a conseqeuent burial by WCW. Oh wait, that's later this year. Back in the ring, and an Austin kneedrop gets two. Abdominal stretch, eventually using the ropes for leverage. Man, that's two Flair tributes in the show so far, and we've got the real thing in the main event. Muta breaks the hold and hits another beautiful dropkick, but misses a top-rope version, and Austin locks in the Hollywood and Vine, which is your basic Goldberg-style rolling inside toehold. Unfortunately, the translator apparently forgot to tell Keiji not to kill Austin's new finisher already, and he no-sells, causing Austin to break the hold in disgust after a few seconds. To make matters worse, Muta follows up with his own version of Austin's other finisher, the Stun Gun. That's just mean-spirited. Austin staggers to the corner and Muta nails the handspring elbow, then follows up with a top rope rana. Then, just as the crowd is getting majorly into it again, Muta backdrops Austin over the top rope, and referee Nick Patrick disqualifies him. This wouldn't have been quite so horrible had Badd not clotheslined Page over the top rope with no DQ in the first match. Muta takes out his frustration by levelling both Austin and Parker with a plancha. Take out the restholds and the goofy ending and this one was much better than I expected. Then again, take out the restholds, and the match lasted two minutes. Don't even get me started on the International title. You don't want to know, and if you do, you don't want to hear it from me. Harley Race is out to interrupt the intros here by challenging the winner of this match on behalf of Vader. Race tries to attack Sting from behind but gets tossed outside for his troubles. Rude attempts to attack Sting from behind, but Sting back body drops him , then CLOTHESLINES HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE. Yes, I'm still pissed. Sting follows him out and hits a vertical suplex on the floor before Rude can even get his robe off. Back in the ring, and the two trade punches. Sting whips Rude into the corner and follows with the dreaded Stinger Scream. Backdrop suplex, and a backrake to welcome Terry Bo-bo to the fed, I guess. Three consecutive high-jump elbows by Sting. Front chancery, but Rude powers up and crotches Sting on the top rope. Backdrop suplex by Rude followed by a camel clutch. Sting powers out of the move twice, the second time with a victory roll, but Rude reverses the pin attempt, sitting right on Sting's face. Eeewww. We return to Kick and Punch Land while Rude catches his breath. Sleeperhold and more punches, but Sting makes a sudden visit to No-sellville (Bo-bo's got a summer home) and hits an atomic drop, then two inverted versions. Three clothelines to follow. UGLY back body drop, as it looked like Rude tried to land on his feet, instead twisting his ankle badly. Whip to the corner, but the Stinger Splash takes out both Rude and the referee. Harley Race and Vader are both out, but Sting fights both back. Rude uses the opportunity to drive a knee into Sting's back as Vader and Race roll to the outside. Rude Awakening attempt, and Race is back in with a chair to "help", but accidentally nails Rude with a chairshot that would make Joel Gertner proud, and NOW the ref is up to count the pin, as Sting wins the worthless Gold Belt. Entertaining match, but in a Sports Entertainmant way more than a Wrestling way. Not bad by any means, though. This one is announced as a bunkhouse match, which would seem by definition to favor Buck. In case you don't know, "bunkhouse match" means pretty much the same as "Chicago street fight" or "WWF Hardcore Title match", your basic no DQ brawl. Rhodes had recently lost the US title to Austin and was stuck in a feud with Parker's entire stable, the newest member of which was Buck. Rhodes hits a nice running lariat from the rampway to the ring to start, and that's all the play-by-play you get from me. Lots of punching, lots of kicking, a couple of bulldogs, both men juice buckets, and a shot with brass knucks gives Buck his first PPV victory in an upset. Great match for what it was, believe it or not. Ventura interviews Rude in the back, who's less-than-thrilled at Race's botched interference in his title match. Vader interrupts and the two brawl, with the locker room heels breaking up the fight after a couple of minutes. Wait a minute, Sags is naked- no! Noooo! Nooooo!!!! "The Boss" is Ray Traylor's first gimmick after returning from his Big Bossman stint in the WWF. He's the Boss, man- get it? The WWF sued WCW over the obvious copyright infringement, but we'll get to that in a minute. Vader is hugely over as "tweener" at this point in his career, although all it took was a couple of powerbomb no-sells by Bo-bo to ruin his WCW career later in the year. This one's announced twice as a "Gigantic Grudge Match", so I guess that's the official name. Traylor attacks Vader on the rampway to start, and clotheslines him over the top rope into the ring. Big boot by Traylor (hey, WCW got sued for calling him Boss, I'm sure as hell not going to do it), and he punches Vader OVER THE TOP ROPE. Both men outside on the rampway, and Vader gets the better of the brawl. Vader bodyslams Traylor over the top rope into the ring and attempts a running hands-free splash over the top, but Traylor gets his knees up, then takes control with punches. Clothesline OVER THE TOP AGAIN, and both men are on the floor for the usual guardrail spots. Back in the ring, and an unprotected headbutt from Traylor splits Vader's mouth open. See, that's why the Big Choad headbutts his own hand. Impressive bodyslam from Traylor, but Vader comes back with stiff palm shots. He back body drops Traylor (OVER THE TOP ROPE), but Traylor inadvertantly kicks him in the face on the way out, and now Vader's bleeding hardway from the mouth AND the right eye. Vader suplexes Traylor back into the ring from the apron and hits a running splash. Traylor back with a running clothesline, but Vader comes back with a nasty one of his own. Pump splash attempt by Vader, but Traylor slams him off the top from behind, badly, dropping him right on his arm. As stiff as he's known for working, I'm really surprised Vader hasn't "accidentally" busted open Traylor as payback for all the punishment he's taking. Traylor with a DDT off the top rope, then something really ugly off the top. He goes for something else off the top, but Vader catches him with a powerslam. Pump splash only gets two, so Vader goes back up top and nails a moonsault for the win. After the match, Traylor gets attacked with his own nightstick by Race, but eventually takes control and beats both Vader and Race with the nightstick and handcuffs. Ventura attempts to interview Traylor in the back, but Commissioner Nick Bockwinkel interrupts and strips him of his cuffs, nightstick, and identity, calling him a disgrace to the uniform of peace officers. This was, of course, a direct result of the WWF lawsuit, and Traylor was repackaged as the Guardian Angel, which led to ANOTHER lawsuit by the real-life Guardian Angel and eventually to the return of Big Bubba, Dungeon of Doomer. You don't really need play-by-play here, do you? This one is pretty much an updated version of their three 1989 matches, one of which is pretty much a unanimous choice as Greatest Match of All Time. The story here is a little more complicated than it was in '89; Steamboat had returned to WCW as an ally of the face Flair, and the two had teamed up for weeks prior to this. Flair was subtly turning heel the whole time, and eventually this match was signed, although both men are still technically faces. Five years after their classic series, both men are older and slower, so there's a little less action and a little more psychology in this one, which is fine by me. Again, if you've seen any of the '89 matches, you've more or less seen this one, and if you haven't seen them, well, you're not a true wrestling fan. Loads of crisp matwork here, near-falls, great reversal-counter reversal sequences, and PSYCHOLOGY PSYCHOLOGY PSYCHOLOGY. Flair finally starts cheating about halfway through the thirty-five minute match, much to Heenan's delight. Ending is either a classic or incredibly cheap, depending on your point of view: Steamboat gets Flair up in his double-chickenwing submission, but Flair manages to hook his legs around Steamboat's, and both men fall to the mat. Steamboat keeps the double-chickenwing on and attempts to bridge up to pin Flair, but both men's shoulders are down as Nick Patrick makes the three count. Replay shows that neither man got a shoulder up in time, and Flair retains the belt using baseball's tie-goes-to-the-runner rule as justification. If I was a match-rating kind of guy, I'd give this one * * * * as opposed to * * * * * for the culmination of the '89 series, but I'm not, so I won't. Let's just call it a must-see. End of show. Great PPV all-around. Pre-Hogan 1994 was a highpoint for WCW, as Flair was doing most of the booking, much as he was in WCW's OTHER highpoint in '89. Nothing was patently bad, and a couple of matches that should have been mediocre- Buck-Rhodes and Vader-Traylor- were pretty damn good. The tag match and main event alone are worth getting this tape. So do so. |
