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What's this- Mr. Workrate doing a review of one of the most laughable Sports Entertainment PPVs of the 90's - the Match Made in Heaven/Match Made In Hell Summerslam? Well, I picked up this tape for three bucks solely for the Hennig/Hart match, which is well worth it; but it's an added bonus to remember just how bad the WWF was before Hogan left. So here goes. Tape opens with commercials for WWF Action Figures and a WBF promo. Tee hee. To the backstage area, where Randy Savage is pacing in his locker room in anticipation of the Match Made in Heaven. On the offchance you have no idea what I'm talking about...Savage has relatively recently turned face here, and in doing so his abusive relationship with valet Miss Liz has magically become a beloved union, so much so that the two are getting married, live on PPV. In reality, of course, they'd been married all along. Lord Alfred Hays interviews Savage, and general Macho Madness ensues. MATCH ONE: RICKY STEAMBOAT, KERRY VON ERICH, and THE BRITISH BULLDOG v. POWER AND GLORY and THE WARLORD Let's see...one of these guys is dead, two are retired, two are blacklisted from the major promotions, and who the hell knows what's up with Davey Boy Smith right now. The heels are managed by the Rev, Slick, who WCW should really dig up to manage Booker T now. We start out with the only decent pairing - Steamboat and Paul Roma - who work a pre-lucha reversal sequence. Roma hits a horrible-looking dropkick but misses off the top, and Steamboat starts working the arm. Imagine that. Roma tags in Hercules, and Steamboat tags in the Texas Tornado. You know, once you know that von Erich was working on a prosthetic foot, it's pretty obvious, as the extremity in question gets planted and spun on in ways you don't usually associate with flesh. Tag to Bulldog, who works in the Iron Man suplex. The heels take over as Warlord works over Steamboat for a while with his usual sloppy, dangerous power stuff. After a couple of minutes of boring-beyond-words "action", a big ol' brawl breaks out, and Steamboat hits a flying bodypress off the top onto Roma for the pin. Really boring opener. To the back for an interview with Mr. Perfect and the Coach, which leads us to... MATCH TWO: MR. PERFECT v. BRET HART, Intercontinental title match Hart dominates to start, so Hennig rolls to the outside to stall. Back in, and it's more Hart, including a nice crucifix that gets two. Hennig gets NO offense in for the first eight minutes or so, as most of it has Hart tenaciously holding a side headlock. Well, hey, if you're going to fight over a friggin' HEADLOCK, do it in the first eight minutes, at least. Hennig gets dumped outside and decided he's had enough, so he heads to the back for the countout, but Hart follows him and drags him back to the ring, ripping apart Hennig's tights in the process, and a closed fist finally turns the tide for Mr. Perfect, as he sends Hart to the outside. In true dick heel mode, Hennig chops Hart to the ground outside, then steps on his back to roll back into the ring. Way to go, Curt. Shot of Stu and Helen in the crowd, and in 1991 they looked ancient. Back in the ring, Hennig Ric Flairs the hell out of Hart, ending with a rolling neck snap and a dropkick that sends Hart to the outside again. Back in, and Hennig counters another crucifix attempt with a brutal Samoan Drop. Perfectplex, but Hart KICKS OUT. This was a big deal in '91. Hart mounts a comeback, hitting an ugly atomic drop, then crotching Hennig on the ring post on a hiptoss. Vertical suplex, Russian leg sweep, backbreaker, second-rope elbow. And what does that sequence ALWAYS set up. Well, not this time, as Hennig gets a fluke rollup for two and the two hit the floor again for a brawl. Back in, and Hart kicks at the left knee, but a Sharpshooter attempt is broken up by the Coach, and Hennig attacks from behind. Then, one of my favorite endings of all time: Hennig crotches Hart on the ropes, then drops a legdrop between the legs. He tries another one, but Hart holds on to Hennig's leg, grapevines, turns over on the canvas, and pulls himself up into Sharpshooter position, and Hennig submits. BEAUTIFUL ending, and Bret celebrates the title win with his mom and dad. Awww. Backstage interview with Andre the Giant and the Bushwhackers. ANDRE ON THE STICK- NOOOOO!!! Jimmy Hart is a big fat liar, is the gist of it. MATCH THREE: THE BUSHWHACKERS v. THE NATURAL DISASTERS Do I have to? Why, no I don't! Disasters win a WAAAY-too-long match with an Earthquaks ass-splash. The Disasters circle Andre to attack, but the Legion of Doom hit the ring to even the odds. Backstage, Bobby Heenan challenges Hulk Hogan on behalf of the "REAL World's Champion", Ric Flair. Heavy stuff at the time. MATCH FOUR: MILLION DOLLAR MAN v. VIRGIL Virgil had recently turned face and had been "training" with color commentator Roddy Piper for this match, which is for the Million Dollar belt, last held, of course, by the Ringmaster Steve Austin. Virgil dominates with your basic face arsenal to start, as the poor guy has to pretend he just learned how to wrestle. He misses a plancha to the outside- in '91- and Dibiase proceeds to absolutely dominate his former manservant, but gets too cocky for his own good, and Virgil locks in the Million Dollar Dream. |
